"I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. For the creation waits in eager expectation for the children of God to be revealed. For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God. We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption to sonship, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently." Romans 8:18-25
Father, I am waiting for you to show up in my suffering, in my home where Jesus is a stranger and the darkness hovers over like a cloud. I am groaning for you, groaning as in childbirth for so many of my friends that ignore their need for you in their lives. Screaming out for you to show up and to help and to heal in so many places where I see the outcomes of my sin. To come. I long for you, a longing that seems dry and empty. But in this season of longing, I know and trust that it is only You that put me here. That this longing itself is a promise. Instead of this thirst and desperation being the lack of Your answer, help me to see that maybe it IS the answer or at least the presence of it. Your promise is true and great and holy. You will come, You will show up, and You will heal and fill and pour love and grace over the parts of my heart and soul that are dying to be quenched. I pray for patience as I wait, that I may wait well and not be afraid to go deeper into the longing of my heart. May I be stricken with lovesick desire for You, sweet Lord.
"What is desire satisfied without desire unmet? how our hearts need to go hungry before we are fed."