Monday, December 6, 2010
Friday, December 3, 2010
Simeon is everything I want to be around Christmas time.
First, it says that Simeon is righteous. He is trying, with everything in him to be moral and virtuous. And second, it says that Simeon is devout. He is running after the Lord and seeking him in preparation for the salvation of Israel. In the silence, Simeon knew that the Lord would come again. In some versions it says that "the breathe of God was upon him" instead of the Holy Spirit. I love that, love that the breath of God and the Holy Spirit are the same. The breathe of God consumes me and carries me. Simeon was moved by the spirit, just at the right moment, in perfect timing to come face to face with the light of the world. I think about my life and the moments when push of the Holy Spirit was very apparent and am overwhelmed by the provision of the Lord.
I pray that my heart ready for the coming of the Lord in my life. That, as Simeon, I will wait for the Lord patiently and faithfully, trusting that He will show up. I pray that my life is one that seeks righteousness and devoutness. That sprints to the cross with everything I have. I also pray that I am stripped of myself and allow the Holy Spirit to carry me into the presence of Jesus where my eyes can see salvation.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Thursday, September 9, 2010
"Yet I call this to mind and I HAVE HOPE; because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; GREAT is your faithfulness. I say to myself, 'The Lord is my portion', therefore I will wait on him. The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him, it is good to WAIT QUIETLY for the salvation of the Lord." Lamentations 3:21-26
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
I am so often the prodigal son. Taking my money, my worth, everything that the Lord has created for me and throwing it all away on junk. I get so lost in the mess. Lonely, bruised, broken. Longing for a heart that is whole and a life that is more than the nothing I let mine become. But I know my way home. I know where my heart belongs. And every time I get a little lost, I hear Jesus calling me back to him. Whispering that he loves me. Kissing my wretched soul and picking up the pieces of my life they are precious bits of gold. There is nothing more overwhelming than the holy embrace of a Father that loves me to the ends of the earth.I am captivated and amazed by the love of our God today. A God that never gives up and that is WITH me, always.
Monday, May 24, 2010
I reached the pit of the black nothing. It was colder and darker than I had ever dreamt of. Yes, I had dreamt of this place before. This place where I thought my broken heart could be forgotten forever. Where life seemed to have no meaning, which is what I thought I wanted. The wind was gone, or so it seemed.
Suddenly I was in chains. They were heavy and tight. I tried to break free but I was weak. Hopeless I laid there with nothing but the darkness to comfort me. Was anyone going to help me? Just like I had predicted, the reality of my brokenness hit, and hit hard. It was as if someone had dropped a dozen bricks on top of my lungs. As if someone has ripped out my heart with his bare hands and was stomping on it over and over. I couldn’t breathe and I was sure that I would die soon.
Then, the wind came.
It filled my lungs with more air than I had ever taken in before. It lifted me out of the black and carried me above the clouds. I would have been afraid if it hadn’t been so strong. I trusted it to hold me. It was gentle as it showed me the wonderful things I had been walking away from.
The wind had been fighting for me all along.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
Whenever the moon shimmers on top of the ocean, I will remember your eyes.
The night was perfect. The gentle and cool air crept its way between our bodies, giving me more reason to step in closer. I could hear your heart racing and feel your warm breath on my neck as we hugged. You said that you hate showing affection in public, so the fact that we were on a popular peer surrounded by people made me feel special. But you always made me feel special. Knowing my heels are killing me, you scooped me up in your arms and carried me down to the beach. You sat me down gently in the sand and patiently waited for me to take of my shoes. Then you stuck out your hand to help me up, something you were always doing. Not just in a physical sense, but emotionally as well. I like that I didn't even have to ask you for help or tell you when I need someone to talk to because you already knew.
You wanted to walk but I had something else in mind. I started sprinting clumsily for the dark ocean. You didn't follow, but instead just watched from the shoreline. I splashed some water your way and begged you to get in, but honestly, all I really wanted was for you to look at me like that forever. Your eyes were tender as they soaked in every detail of the moment. As I made my way back into your arms, I realized how wet I really was. My shorts were soaked but we just laughed about it. We sat and you listened as I rambled about my life. You laughed at my stupid jokes and smiled as I talked about my friends and family that you had never met, asking questions and prying open my past. I loved that you were patient with me as I tried to make sense of my messy life for you. I ran my fingers through the sand and looked up only to find you starring at me again with those eyes. You played with my hair and twisted it around your finger as we talked, but somehow you still managed to pay attention to every word that spilled out of my mouth. And even when there were moments of silence, we were still so comfortable.
I turned around to face you. Its was cute, the way that even when the slightest crack of a smile appeared on your face it created dimples that covered your cheeks. Our hands entwined, bodies close. I thought you were going in for the kill but instead you starred into my eyes and said, "What are you thinking right now?" I was shocked that you actually wanted to know. After quickly trying to clear my throat to erase the shakiness from my voice, I said, “How this has been the perfect night; dinner, the ocean, the beach, everything.”
I didn't tell you the truth, well at least not the whole truth anyway. Yes, the night was perfect, but it wasn’t because I could see almost every star in the sky or because the moon was almost full. It wasn’t because I was at the beach and I could hear the sound of the waves crashing on the shore behind us. The truth was all I was thinking about was you; how badly I wanted to kiss your smooth lips, how I wish we had more than just two days until I had to leave you, how this is the best first date I could have ever asked for with a boy unlike the rest that crowded my memories.
It felt like a year between the last syllable that uttered from my lips and the time that your lips were on mine, but when it happened it was bliss. Your hands slowly let go of mine and crept their way up to my neck where your fingertips hid in my blonde curls. I kept hearing something in my hear that sounded like the beat of a drum, but then I realized it was your heart beating loud and fast. I made your heart beat faster? ….Me? I pulled in closer and kissed with more passion than before realizing that my heart was beating faster too.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
I don't know if its the weather or my heart, but I am stir crazy. I long for adventure of any kind. I long for sunshine and wonder. I long for the windows down and my heart soaring free. I want to be wild and passionate. Loving and forgiving. I want to give dangerously. I'm ready for something new. This cold winter that has been hanging around on my skin and in my soul has got to go. It times for sun. For life the way you want it and planned it.