Monday, May 24, 2010

the wind.

The wind blew fiercely, as if it was trying to push me away, but I fought against it. I pushed harder and harder into the darkness of the night. The rain formed a cold blanket over my body as I walked away, not knowing where I was going or what was next. All I knew was that if I stopped the pain in my chest would become unbearable and the reality of my broken heart would kick in. Then again, maybe all I needed was to let myself go with the wind, but I didn’t think of that at the time.
I reached the pit of the black nothing. It was colder and darker than I had ever dreamt of. Yes, I had dreamt of this place before. This place where I thought my broken heart could be forgotten forever. Where life seemed to have no meaning, which is what I thought I wanted. The wind was gone, or so it seemed.
Suddenly I was in chains. They were heavy and tight. I tried to break free but I was weak. Hopeless I laid there with nothing but the darkness to comfort me. Was anyone going to help me? Just like I had predicted, the reality of my brokenness hit, and hit hard. It was as if someone had dropped a dozen bricks on top of my lungs. As if someone has ripped out my heart with his bare hands and was stomping on it over and over. I couldn’t breathe and I was sure that I would die soon.
Then, the wind came.
It filled my lungs with more air than I had ever taken in before. It lifted me out of the black and carried me above the clouds. I would have been afraid if it hadn’t been so strong. I trusted it to hold me. It was gentle as it showed me the wonderful things I had been walking away from.
The wind had been fighting for me all along.


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